3 Ways to Cope with Being Stuck in Transition

Have you ever felt stuck between two stages of life? Maybe you’ve graduated college/university but haven’t found a job yet, or you’re working on making a dream happen but it’s still a ways off?

That’s where I am right now. I’m about to move into my first house — an exciting stage to be sure, but it’s taken a long time to get here and still isn’t quite here — and I’m having a little trouble finding balance.

Waiting

We started looking for a house last summer. When it comes to decision making, I’m not the best…in fact, I’m more like Goldilocks. So when winter arrived, we were still looking. Right before Christmas, we found it — a prewar house in an urban neighbourhood, showing its age but also its history. We walked away, came back, closed the deal.

That was at the beginning of this year. Since then, there’s been lots of waiting. And talking, and planning, and thinking, and researching, but for months, no chance for actual doing.

Living room

Our living room in transition

We finally took possession a month ago…and promptly turned the keys over to a contractor for necessary renovations. More waiting. More talking about we’re going to do once we’re in. We’ve been there a number of times now, walking through the construction mess, trying to picture it all finished and ours.

It still doesn’t feel like ours.

Coping

Here’s what we’re doing to cope with being in-between:

1. Taking action where we can. We can’t move in or do anything inside yet…but we’ve worked in the garden, physically dug up weeds and moved soil around, and that has made a big difference to our feeling of ownership.

2. Living as if we’re already there. We’ve chatted with our next-door neighbours. We’ve hung out in the neighbourhood and people-watched and bought things from at least four different stores/restaurants nearby. We’re even getting a few pieces of mail there already. It’s surprisingly exciting to see our names listed with our new address (though I cannot for the life of me remember two postal (zip) codes at the same time).

3. Dreaming and planning. Oh, the ambitious plans we have! Don’t ask me where we think we’re going to find the time, but the house and yard are already quite different in our heads. Go check out my Pinterest and you’ll see what I mean about dreaming.

Preparing

Our move-in date is coming up fast now, and there’s a lot to do before then. I still haven’t realized that it’s actually happening, and soon, because we’ve been in-between for so long. It’s time to stop thinking and start moving forward. Time for a new transition. Time to become real homeowners at last. Soon…but not quite yet.

How do you handle the in-between stages of life?

If you liked this post, you might also like A Love Letter to Our Future House or 5 Ways to Make Decision-Making Easier.

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3 responses to “3 Ways to Cope with Being Stuck in Transition

  1. Not very well. Although most of life does end up being in-between so I’m trying very hard to live in the moment and not call in-between anything other than here and now. :)

  2. What Sara said… lol! I tend to anxious when I know a change is coming, and coming, and coming, but hasn’t arrived yet. It really brings out my control issues in a not so good way. Living in the moment, capturing those moments and holding them in my mind helps lessen the anxiety and the need to control. Good luck with your move!

  3. Sara and Tami, I’m glad I’m not the only one who struggles with the in-between stages! Living in the moment is something I tend to forget. Thanks for the reminder. :-)

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